Oh shit I’ve resorted to ‘poetry’

I’d like to get pregnant by rooting

Preferably after several drinks

Jumping up and down at a band

Having sex on demand

When husbands don’t have time to think


I’d like to get pregnant with my husband

I’d prefer we were both in the room

Without calendar thermometer

Needles or pedometer

Without a feeling of impending doom


I’d like to get pregnant soon please

With no drugs or doctors or tests

And certainly no stirrups

At least before we are in it

I’d like us to feel like we’re blessed


Look I’d really like to be pregnant

And I really don’t want a bill

I am finding it tough

And I think that it’s rough

That all you people are involved, yet still


I’d really like to be pregnant

And not sick before the event

And I don’t want anaesthetising

Or age stats proselytising

Or a letter on how it all went.


But I’m trying not to be a princess

And I’m taking the jabs like a man

And I’m drinking my water

And doing what I oughta

Al though I’m no IVF fan


 I’d really like us to be pregnant

We’d be a great mum and dad

So pardon my ‘tude

If it seems I am rude

But mate, IVF makes you mad.



Make a life start while we’re not around

Then stick it inside

And then run and hide

While the hormones they run me aground.


I’m not sure you heard me the first time


Its a day job to you

So we’re struggling through

But make us a daughter, or son?


We’d really like to be pregnant

Or it’s three thousand bucks down the drain

There’s 5 more days of waiting

And IVF hating

Then we may have to do it again.


It must be a powerful urge then

To help this species go on

If we put up with this shit

And then pay for it

To give us a daughter or son.


I’d like to give a happy ending

But now it’s just wait quietly

It’s breathe through Sunday

and just wait until Monday

And then, at midday, we’ll see.



3 thoughts on “Oh shit I’ve resorted to ‘poetry’

  1. sisyphus74

    Oh shit lovie you make me smile and lord knows I could use one.
    Funny you should mention all this new age crappola cause I’m in a place where its being forced down my throat 24/7
    I have my fingers and toes crossed for you and as someone helpfully suggested to me today
    “when you are going through hell, keep going.”
    You are never far from my somewhat scattered thoughts.
    S x

    1. Don’t knock scattered thoughts lovie. Order is overrated. Thinking of you in your little ivf induced hell. It makes mine look like a sunday picnic. At least you are in a good quality place – I was terrified you’d gone public (eek!). Good advice about hell. I also kept going to the bar…this also helped. At least for a few hours…..you hang in there you tough bitch. And I like the nickname. Very greek tragedy. And bloody hell I know the sisyphus feeling (and in fact once talked about sisyphus to a good doctor when I had depression….). Not long til Mai Tai sunday….

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